When you forget yourself in meetings you are entirely focused in the other one. You meet the other one where they are instead of just being there.
We all know the analogy about the tip of the iceberg. You either choose to observe just the tip of the iceberg or the whole of it. So when, you meet people totally focused on them you will observe the whole of them.
It seems, unfortunaletly, to ber very hard! Why? We are so occupied with ourself so that we will miss a lot of information in the communication between us. As a matter of fact, science has shown that we consciously are able to recieve not more than 7 (+/- 2 ) signals per second by our five senses (see, hear, feel, smell and taste). Science has also shown that we unconsciously receive 2 million signals per second.
We cannot, not communicate!
That´s an axiom! We communicate all the time. Even when we try not. When you are not ”not there” for the other person, they will sense it consciously and unconsciously.
Both you and I have clear memories of meetings where the other one were totally taking our perspective. We call them good meetings. You both felt listen to! We all know that, and yet we forget. Why is it so important to ”be there”?
Because:
- Information
- you will miss a lot of interesting information, you will just receive and interpret a glimpse of the information
- Information is filtered from your own interest and based on your needs and the way you interpret the world
- Your world
- The other one sense and feels that you are not interested in them
- You block out the other one and assume that everyone thinks and interpret the way you interpret the world
- You assume they have the same values as you do, without asking them
- Perception
- You assume that their strongest sense is the same as you.
- Maybe you have great eyes and you see information as pictures
- Maybe they are colour blind but thet hear things you do not hear
- You assume that their strongest sense is the same as you.
Good communication leads to good relations! When you are in a relationsship, married etc, the other person have chosen to be with you and wants to be with you. Because they, most likely, are convinced that you understand them better than anyone else.
The answer is to be 100% focused in the meeting by ”forget yourself” it builds values and you both will grow! It is a magic formula. We call it: #PeopleMakePeopleGrow!
It builds values that are essential to us as human beings! It creates great values in the business you are attending to. Values that will transform into and shown as digits, results and values called money. So if you want success in relations, business and life?
Be sure to have meetings where you ”forget yourself”!